Lessons on Faith

Juicy Peppah

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THERE are many things in the world that our hearts desire. It may be material like money, food, clothing, shelter, or gadgets, or immaterial like love, security, wisdom, reason, or fame. Most of the times, we tend to want the things that would make our hearts happy.

Living a happy, secure, and comfortable life has been a fancy for most people. That idea made me think of everyone’s God. Did people create the concept of God only to satisfy their hearts’ desires? For years, I was raised with the idea that God was Someone to turn to only for supplications. That was why most of the time, I tend to pray for things better wished for than prayed for.

For twelve years, I have overlooked the word faith, which has always been associated with prayer. It was only when I turned eighteen that I learned that idea, and operationally, it was my act of holding on to God’s promise (to fulfill my desires).

Some things I have been dying to achieve—like losing weight permanently and excelling academically—would not really come true no matter how many times I would beg God to give it to me. But as I look back, I realized: I might have faith in God that He can give me that scorching hot body and unsurpassed intelligence, but not at a snap of a finger. I can pray and say I have faith, but after praying I lie down and wait for everything to happen soon as I wake up.

How could I forget? “Faith without works is dead,” James wrote. Maybe if I disciplined myself a bit, I would have easily reduced a number of dress sizes and graduated with flying colors at the same time.

I don’t really have an idea how God works because I am a material being, but I used to and still believe that God answers one’s prayers only when (1) one is sincere—one asks for a favor out of the desire of one’s heart and moves or works out of faith, (2) it is a need—God gives us the things we need for our journey, and to do our part, we must use these [things].

The idea that God knows what we need was not really that clear to me until my upcoming licensure exam. Mama provided me an unconscious explanation of it when she advised me one of these days to pray to God—when I refused to because I have been too busy indulging myself into that dreadfully gratifying pictures in my idle mind.

She said one night, “Pray, pray, pray with a thankful heart. Ask God to clear your mind, to make you understand the directions and questions, to make straight your thinking… Don’t ask Him to give you the correct answers; God does not give correct answers. Don’t even ask Him to let you pass. Just pray that He makes you feel relaxed and be with you during the exam…”

Those things—which mama herself used to pray before her board exam—those things may be more pleasing to God than begging to let me pass the exam or making me stand above the rest of the examinees.

Exercising faith does not necessarily mean holding on to one’s desires, as I reflect further, but an act of believing that one can work more efficiently using God’s blessings that have always been around. I consider mama as one of God’s greatest blessings, one who causes me to disregard the irrational cravings of my deceitful heart and directs me to the right path through faith.